CORRECTION

Earlier versions of this post contained a number of assertions about secret James Bond screen tests featuring a leading British actor. The Tea Caddy has subsequently learned that this information was entirely false and its source wholly unreliable. I have been assured that no such screen tests took place, and that the actor in question was not at any point required to play out a scene in which he demanded that Q “pimp his ride like a bitch”. Sorry for any confusion. If there’s a lesson in all this, it’s that I should stick to what I know and leave the celebrity gossip to the experts.

A Winter Warmer

It’s no secret that I detest the lazy habit of calling any old bit of dried plant matter ‘tea’, so I ought to be writing a letter of complaint to the makers of Cotswold Fruits Blend Loose Leaf Tea, currently on sale as a ‘Best of British’ item in M&S food stores. It contains zero percent tea, and is loose leaf only in the sense that muesli is also ‘loose leaf’. Had I read the label more carefully the tin would not have ended up in my basket, but I only had my driving glasses with me at the time.

A fortuitous confluence of flavours

After realising my mistake I was all set to put the stuff out for bird feed when it occurred to me that I should at least try blending it with some actual tea. The results were unexpectedly delightful, and I wholeheartedly recommend adding a spoonful to your favourite leaf for a light but satisfying winter drink that stimulates the taste buds while warming the cockles.

Don’t Try This At Home

It should probably have come as no surprise to learn that some readers took my words at face value when I suggested that a power tool was required to drag the full potential flavour out of round teabags (previous entry). My sympathies go out to the family of Mr G Fradd from Whitstable and to the anonymous reader who obliterated his great-grandmother’s antique Spode teapot with a Bosch PSB 750, but my legal team has assured me that I cannot be held liable for any losses incurred. The plain fact is there’s only one guaranteed way to avoid being disappointed by round bags: don’t use them. (And that’s my final word on the subject.)